


No, You're Not

by kanesexual



Series: Hidekane Week 2018 [6]
Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Day 6, F/M, Hide is sad, Hidekane Week 2018, I promise, Panic Attacks, did i say angst, ha, hidehaise, hidekane, its not that angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 13:52:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 612
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15487257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kanesexual/pseuds/kanesexual
Summary: Hide meets a man identical to Kaneki.-Day 6- Heartache / Love Letter / The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?





	No, You're Not

**Author's Note:**

> This is my favorite. I love Hidehaise angst

Struggling against the crowd of people, Hide finally spots the place he was looking for.

_:re._

Sighing and struggling to plaster a smile on his face, he rushes across the street, just barely avoiding getting hit. Glaring at the passing car, he adjusts his jacket, opening the door to the cafe. Immediately feeling welcome as the smell of coffee and mint reach his nose, he makes his way to the bookshelves.

_Kaneki would love it here._

Heart aching at the thought of his friend, he searches for the one thing that puts his mind at rest. Panicking as he couldn't find it, he wonders if someone else had the title he was looking for. 

_Where is it where is it where is it where is-_  

"Are you okay?"

Startled out of his panic, he turns around, gasping at the sight of the man in front of him. Finding himself frozen in place as he stares at the person standing before him, he feels a lump form in his throat.  _He can't be here. He left. He left you alone after you let him-_

Noticing a hand on his shoulder, he glances up into  _his_  face. "Are you okay?"

Forcing himself to swallow and get his shit together, Hide smiles reassuringly. "Yeah. I'm fine."

Getting a smile in return, he stares at the man's lips as he talks. Watching as the stranger extended his arm, his eyes. "Okay, good. I just- I'm Haise Sasaki."

_Sasaki._

"Nagachika Hideyoshi," His reassuring smile melts from his face, replaced by a sad one. "But, you can call me Hide."

_It's nice to meet you again, Kaneki._

* * *

Slamming the door to his apartment, Hide leans on the wall for support. 

_Shit._

Feeling tears build his eyes, he hastily wipes them away. He will  _not_  allow himself to cry over this.

He won't.

Stumbling to his room and rushing to his bed, he tried to focus on anything but Kaneki.

His heart pounded in his ears as his lungs fought for air, each breath turning into sharp, desperate gasps for air. His hands shook as he desperately clutched the sheets between his fingers, trying to bring himself back to reality. His feet tingled until he couldn't feel them. His vision darkened as if he were looking through a fish-eye lens. He was rapidly succumbing to his the mental breakdown.

He allowed his anxiety to grab his legs and drag him down into darkness.

* * *

 Groaning, he woke up feeling like shit.

_I didn't even realize that I had fallen asleep._  

Making a futile attempt to fall back asleep, he found himself wobbling towards his closet. Pulling the knob, he searched for a blue hoodie.

_You just had a panic attack when you saw him again. You probably shouldn't wear his hoodie._

Ignoring his thoughts, he shrugs it on anyway, welcoming the warmth and comfort it provided. Burying his nose into the jacket, he sighs, feeling dried tears and snot on his face. 

Shuffling to his bathroom, he turns on the tap, splashing cold water on his face. Humming at the contrast between his skin and the water, he carefully dries his face with a towel. 

Glancing up into the mirror, he frowns at his reflection. His hazel brown eyes were dull and void of all life, face just as blank. His hair was matted and oily, as he hasn't washed it in weeks.

He was a mess. 

Not wanting to look at himself any longer, he sets the cloth down, going straight to his bed. Curling on his side, he feels a stray tear run over his cheek. 

_I'm Haise Sasaki._

Against his will, more tears fall.

_No, you're not._


End file.
